Facing East Press-a-Palooza

Variety

New York Times

Broadway.Com (1)

Broadway.Com (2)

Playbill

Theater Mania

ONTD!

STAY TUNED...

The Best Backhanded Compliment I've Probably Ever Received

(Said to me the other night by Facing East partner Duane as we were going over some schtuff:)

"Oh, Em... You would totally be my type if I were single. And you were single. And I was drunk."

Kitschy B-Film Festival: Plan 10 From Outer Space

"Just because he made it up, doesn't mean it's not true."


Okay, I had been wanting to watch the Mormon themed Sci-Fi film Plan 10 From Outer Space, by filmmaker Trent Harris, for a long time. How could I not after reading the back of the DVD cover?

It is Fellini on an Ed Wood budget. This sci-fi comedy is an outrageous concoction of sexual fantasy, conspiracy theory, and religious satire. It begins when Lucinda Hall deciphers a centuries old book penned by a mad Mormon prophet. In it's pages she discovers a diabolical plot hatched by Nehor, a peeved alien from the planet Kolob. As Lucinda frantically tries to uncover "the secret of the bees" she is sucked into a strange world filled with spacemen, polygamists and angels.

"Rocky Horror meets the Mormons." Cinefantastique Magazine

"Nancy Drew on Acid." Sundance Film Festival

First of all, I highly recommend watching this film in a room full of ex-Mormons, each with a glass of wine in them, which I did. But I have to warn you, if you do, you will hit pause and spin off into lengthy rants about the brain damage of your youth more times than you can count and it will take a ridiculously long time to get through it. But, it will be so worth it.

My favorite thing about truly kitschy B-movies is their oh-so-low production quality. The random horribleness of the costumes, hair and make-up, props, scenery, special effects... The worse they are, the more sublime. And this one didn't disappoint. Although, I gotta say, we were pretty impressed with the spaceship. Not kidding. It rocked.

It began on a high note with a couple fooling around in a car playing BYU's favorite game JUST THE TIP. From there it careened headlong into Peeping Tomfoolery, electric shock aversion therapy, seagull poop, cursed private parts, "hard, sweaty, nasty sex with angels", pioneer women in Go-Go cages, the Mormon Macarena and Karen Black singing a glorious love song / anthem to Kolob - all to a soundtrack that featured the harp with a delightful frequency.

Best lines:

"I'm an artist myself. I also have a motorcycle." Loved the kooky exhibitionist neighbor. Loved, him, loved him, loved him!

"Nehor's comin... OH, YEAH!" This should be mandatorily exclaimed in unison, with true Kool-Aid-esque enthusiasm, by every LDS seminary class studying the Book of Mormon.

"Our windows fuck each other." I blurted this out to my neighbors when I was a virginal young Mormon girl as well. Didn't we all?

The last three are my favorites and stand alone in such a beautifully perfect way, no comment is necessary.

"Your metaphors befoul the air."

"Oh, there's a Plan 10. And it's so horribly insidious it makes my butt quake."

"It makes the church look silly."

Plan 10 From Outer Space was a wild romp through the weirdest of the LDS teachings. Like Barbarella it utilized the beauty of spaceships, goofy double names "Larson Larson" [Pretty Pretty], weird sex and naked extras. But, unlike Barbarella, it left me wanting to boil my brain - which means it did it's job brilliantly.

Barbarella is still the clear Kitschy-B Festival winner - but Plan 10 gets a big fat A for putting Silliness under such an entertaining microscope.



Goodbye feet...

Like Seeing The Face Of God - Only Better

So, my illustrious Facing East producing partner, Duane, and I flew to NYC last weekend to attend the opening night (show and after party) of Priscilla Queen of the Desert starring our, even more illustrious and wonderful, director Will Swenson.

We entered the theater, sat in our ridiculously amazing seats and attempted to take it all in. Who's who of Broadway, TV and film buzzed around us - and I waited.

I knew she would be there - she is one of the producer's. Held my breath. Tried not to explode with anticipation and suddenly... There She Was. 5 rows behind us. One of the single greatest influences on both my personality and my performing, an enormous connection to my father, my idol, my hero, my golden calf, my Venus, my fire, my inspirer of fantastically flowery formulations, my Superstar Supreme, my Deity Delicious...

The Divine Miss M


My dad and I had all her albums and listened to them ad-nauseam. The first time I smoked weed was with my dad and his boyfriend before her Christmas concert in San Francisco. My sweet father, when he was dying, stood for 2 hours in the rain to get her to sign her book The Saga of Baby Divine for me.


I hear her voice saying, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke!" in my head, like the best guardian angel ever, every single time I face the Hateful Cow Club.

Bette Midler, Meryl Streep and Barbara. The Holy Trinity to the daughter of a gay man.

We didn't meet. We didn't speak. She did accidentally grab Duane's arm during intermission - something I will forever be oozing envy over. She has no idea that I even exist. But, she exists. And for a couple of hours we breathed the same air and got swept up in the same Drag Show of Epic Proportions. That is enough for me. For now.




The show itself was as fabulous as expected. Just a giant barrel of good old fashioned drag queen monkey fun. Will was wonderful and brought a depth to the show, with his portrayal of a gay man who is a father and more than a one dimensional drag character, that I loved.

We also sat 2 rows in front of the oh-so-yummy Guy Pearce (who totally made my day by flirting with me at the after party) and next to the ever-lovely, Diva in her own right, adoring girlfriend of Will Audra McDonald.


Amazing weekend. Definitely one for the books. And the blogs.

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Related Links
Facing East
Facing East Website
Facing East Blog
Facing East Contribution Fund

Friday Video: Ain't Gonna Pee-Pee My Bed Tonight ( Aka: Yet Another Argument Against Home Schooling)

Bed wetting polygamists rockin' out with jazz hands and Elohim.

Speechless.

Favorite New Picture: We Will Go Down

This glorious moment of blasphemous irreverence brought to you by MormonGags.Com

Let them that are blessed with understanding, understand. Those that are not, just enjoy the juicy (probably bubblegum flavored) lip-gloss. It's funny. Trust me.

Friday Video: Shaken Manchild Syndrome

PSA: Ben Stiller Speaks Out Against Shaken Manchild Syndrome

New Favorite Website

Scary Sextoy Friday

Do not, I repeat - DO NOT, click on, check out, glance at, browse, loiter on or stalk This Website if you are not a fan of Madcap Adventures of the Sexually Ridiculous.

Mom, that means you. Not kidding.

Baby Bieber: The Onion

This made me laugh.

And then it made my head hurt and my nose bleed.

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Related Posts
Bouncing Baby Bieber

The Russian Bomb Squad? Wow, BOB Is One Powerful Dude

Completely awesome. Russian bomb squad called in to defuse sex toy.

Anti-terrorist bomb squad experts were called to a post office in the northwest of Russia to make safe a package from which a strange ticking sound was coming, local police said on Monday. They found a vibrator.

The incident took place at Petrozavodsk in the republic of Karelia and followed a call from a postal worker who had identified a suspect package, a police spokeswoman told AFP by phone.

"The post building was ringed by the security forces and people were evacuated," she said.

"In the package the bomb squad found a vibrator."

The sex toy had apparently been turned on "by accident."

Speaking of ridiculously entertaining, totally unrelated ticking noises... (Don't think for a second that me and my loin fruit don't have this memorized and haven't broken it out many times while driving around in the car.)

Friday Video #2: The Devil

Speaking of Westboro Baptist Church... Crazy thanks to the Blog-Friend that sent this. XO

Friday Video: Blessed Protection

When I first heard about the Westboro Baptist Church and their protests at funerals I was appalled - for so many reasons.

Watching this brought me to tears. Bless them.

Favorite New Quote

"The truth shall set you free, but first it's going to piss you off."

Truer words were never spoken.

In the name of Charlie Sheen, Amen.

Captured Moment: Oh, Sorry. I Thought Paper Would Protect You

Mark Twain's Big Take On Big Love

I had never read the entire statement written by Mark Twain about the early Mormon polygamists until a friend sent it to me the other day. Thing o' beauty. Pun intended.

Our stay in Salt Lake City amounted to only two days, and therefore we had no time to make the customary inquisition into the workings of polygamy and get up the usual statistics and deductions preparatory to calling the attention of the nation at large once more to the matter.

I had the will to do it. With the gushing self-sufficiency of youth I was feverish to plunge in headlong and achieve a great reform here—until I saw the Mormon women. Then I was touched. My heart was wiser than my head. It warmed toward these poor, ungainly and pathetically "homely" creatures, and as I turned to hide the generous moisture in my eyes, I said, "No--the man that marries one of them has done an act of Christian charity which entitles him to the kindly applause of mankind, not their harsh censure--and the man that marries sixty of them has done a deed of open-handed generosity so sublime that the nations should stand uncovered in his presence and worship in silence.

Johnny Depp In... Where???

Okay, this What Celebrities Would Look Like If They Moved To Utah website is actually really funny. Except Johnny Depp. When I first read the words "Johnny Depp In Taylorsville" I thought, "Please, God. Yes, Yes, Yes!"

And then I saw the photo.


No. NO. NO!!!

Some things are just not funny.

Friday Video: Toddlers & Tiaras With Tom Hanks

I first fell in love with Tom Hanks watching "Bosom Buddies" when I was younger and since "Splash" he's topped my favorite comic actor list. His body of work over the years has been stunning - "Philadelphia" absolutely melted me. The fact that he is still so damn funny and seems to be such a good human... Harem. Definitely.

God bless them for making this. More laugh out loud moments than I can count. "Sexy feet. Sexy Feet. SEXY FEET!!!" "Make Daddy love you... Earn it." And, ohmygawd, The Squirt Bottle!!!

I am peeing.

Facing East

I have mentioned before that I am producing the feature film Facing East, based on my mother's play of the same name. The play premiered, and had a very successful run, here in Salt Lake City in 2004 followed by a run off-Broadway, one in San Francisco and several more around the country.

Facing East is the story of a Mormon couple re-evaluating their lives after the suicide of their gay son. The play was incredible and the screenplay Mom has written is absolutely stunning. I simply cannot wait for us to bring this story to life on screen. We are hoping to premiere the film in 2012. I will most definitely keep you posted.

My partner and I are thrilled to have hired Will Swenson to direct. Will was nominated for a Tony Award for his role as Burger in the Broadway revival of the musical Hair and is currently starring, again on Broadway, in Priscilla Queen of the Desert.





This will be a very fun, and important, ride for all involved. As producers, we are donating a percentage of the film's proceeds to The Trevor Project and are encouraging all our investors to do the same. Because several people have asked how they can donate to this project without actually investing, we have established the Facing East Contribution Fund. All proceeds from this fund will go directly to The Trevor Project. Anyone wishing to contribute may do so online at the
Fractured Atlas Facing East Contribution Fund. Anyone wishing information on how to invest, or otherwise be involved in this project, please contact me directly.

Facing East Website

Facing East Blog

Facing East Facebook Page

Spread the word to any and all interested. This incredible film will, without question, change hearts, heal families and save lives.

Stoopid State Laws: Arizona

Yes, I am aware that I did these out of order. Alphabetically, Arizona does come before Arkansas. Duh. Welcome to me and my own stoopid state.

Okay, In Arizona...

Hunting camels is prohibited. What is with states and their goofy animal laws? Not that they shouldn't have laws to protect animals but, camel hunting? In Arizona? Really? What, are camels just roaming the dunes threatening the dwellers of Mesa and Phoenix? Yeah, don't hunt them - saddle 'em up and ride 'em around.

Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony. So, you're saying that I can tip toe around on private property wearing nothing but a tangerine mask with lime polka-dots and get a slap on the wrist, but if I shoplift a whoopee cushion or bag of Funions while wearing a red mask I'm getting locked up. That totally sucks because everybody knows crimes are only fun when committed while wearing a deep red mask covered with sequins and feathers. Now what's the daughter of a gay man supposed to do for sport? Stand outside the gates of Temple Square in a tutu and play "It's Raining Men" on the bagpipes, I guess.

Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs. Oh, yes they can!!!

It is illegal to manufacture imitation cocaine. But I'm still okay making the real stuff, right?

When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person possesses. What kind of a dumb ass law is this??? Seriously, I am being attacked by a man who has a knife but because all I have on me is my pearl handled machete and my giant can of pepper spray disguised as a Charlies Angels thermos, I am not allowed to defend myself? That's crap, Arizona. Crap.

It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water. Well, rude certainly. But, unlawful? Maybe if you're wearing a red mask at the time of refusal.

You may not have more than two dildos in a house. Oh, hell no. I am crying a big, fat Just Say NO To The Man on this one. Only two dildos??? That's not even humanly possible.

Cards may not be played in the street with a Native American. What if I offer her a glass of water first?

If you bother the cottontails or bullfrogs, you will be fined. Well, sure. Only the Native Americans are for bothering. Duh.

No more than six girls may live in any house. Excuse me? Sorry Brother and Sister Johnson, your sixth and seventh daughters must be sold to the gypsies. Sucks to be you.

A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up. Totally awesome law.

An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders. I agree. Suspenders are lame. Especially the rainbow Mork from Ork ones I wore in 6th grade to hold up my bell bottomed Dittos and bright yellow Chemin de Fers.

No one is permitted to ride their horse up the stairs of the county court house. How about their camel?

It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling. I can't even figure out what this one means. Seriously.

Women may not wear pants. Okay, you asked for it...

Okay, while Arizona at least allows two dildos, which is better than the complete ban in Alabama, it still is not the winner. A donkey in a bathtub did make me laugh out loud - but not nearly as loud as the live moose being pushed from an airplane. Alaska still wins.