Flint Plus LaFawnda Equals True Love Always

Okay, so remember the post about Flint, my hard as steel surprise birthday lover? (Yes, photo to the right is actually him, at the height of his blessed existence, hosting a yard sale for me.) And you know how they say that man should not be alone and that there is someone for everyone? Well, it gives me more pleasure than I can express to introduce you to Flint's Lady Love...









LaFawnda

LaFawnda was actually purchased by some friends of mine, K & D. The back story is sublime...

K & D live about 30 minutes north of Salt Lake. Their next door neighbors had nine children - all of whom were home schooled. This family had a chicken coop in their backyard and a beehive directly next to the chain link fence separating their house from K & D - who have a pool, which means there was a swarm of bees living 30 ft. from the large body of water in their backyard. Not cool.

K & D tried to communicate and negotiate with said neighbors. Nuthin'. They took it to the city and went the rounds in court. They would win every time and neighbors-from-hell would only move the beehive one foot from where it had been - and back to court they would go.

So, D decided that the only way to deal with these people was to fight annoying fire with annoying fire. He purchased LaFawnda, a black mannequin with which he planned on harassing them, online. He specifically wanted a black one so when they complained he could accuse them of being racist.

D. posed LaFawnda in various positions every day all over the yard. Climbing the ladder to the pool naked, lounging in a lawn chair, pressed against the fence staring into the neighbor's yard with a creepy Halloween mask on, doing different activities dressed in different colored wigs and outfits.

Here she can be seen waving to the neighbors from the trampoline...


Neighbors were totally freaked out and called the police on more than one occasion. The Sheriff even came over - almost arresting D. for not taking LaFawnda down. But, as long as the bees were still there, LaFawnda was out and up to her old tricks.

And it worked! The neighbors moved! LaFawnda totally kicks ass and leaves me more bereft than ever at the loss of my Flint.

When I am back in a house with money to spend on my own bizarre entertainment I am TOTALLY buying myself another mannequin. And she will swing in a hammock wearing a crown of Cummingtonite and I will call her Fern and she will be Flint's second wife - because we do that sort of thing here in Utah.

And I will be so happy.