She Rant: #3 From Where I Stand

I am thrilled with the comments the last post got. This is such an important conversation to have. Thank you to those who are jumping in with me. There is no way for me to adequately make every point I want to make on this topic in just one or two posts but I will try and get it all out and wrapped up before oh, say… July.

I agree with many of the points raised. There is far too much generalizing of one another, we are all still stereo-typed on TV and film and, no, in many, many ways we don’t enjoy equal status. The point I wanted to make in the first She Rant post was that I, personally, have benefited so greatly from the feminist battle, my life greatly reaping the benefits of those that fought for me, that I’m honestly just not aware of much inequality against me because I am a woman. And I do get how lucky that makes me.

I know that there are rude and offensive emails sent around about women’s fat asses and inability to drive but I, personally, never see them because no one would dare send me one. They know that I would never stand for it. The incorrect assumption is that, because I am a strong, self assured woman, I, in turn, think that man bashing is funny. I don’t think it is funny to bash anyone for who they are. (*Note: Yes, I get it and have officially retired my rude, incorrect, small minded public mock-bashing of them that make me giggle – we all know what I am referring to - for real and for good.)

Forget the status and treatment of women in other countries - that is a completely separate, and enormously huge, issue. Remember, I am talking about what I see going on around me with the average American woman - what I see here in the Salt Lake valley. I get that there are still women all over this country that don’t receive equal pay for equal work. There are women that don’t have loving and respectful fathers, brothers, boyfriends and husbands. For them, equality is still a huge issue. There are still problems everywhere.

I was speaking with a friend about a stunning documentary he just completed and he made the point that we can only affect what is within our reach – within our circle of influence. We can only make a difference where we can make a difference. All I can do is be vocal about, and try and make a difference regarding, what I see from where I stand here in my own private Emily Pearson Idaho. That is all the best of us can do. That, and take a real close look in the mirror.

I may be totally wrong here but I don’t think that, as a woman, I can hold up a mirror to men about the crap they pull and call them out on it as effectively as I can to women. As I woman I can call us women on the shit we pull and some may listen. If I do the same with men, all I am is just another woman bitching about men.

For whatever reason, I feel as passionately about this as I do about the other things I rant about on this blog. For whatever reason, I feel driven to invite certain of us women to take a close look at some of the problematic things that we do. If you are a woman and honestly don’t do the things I bitch about then I am not talking to. If you look in the mirror I hold up and don’t see your own reflection then, great! That makes me incredibly happy. If you do recognize yourself then I invite you to take a closer look and make some different choices. Work a little harder to make things better, not worse.

My mother has taught me my whole life to leave the world a better place than I found it and I just see a few things around me right now that I think need to be better. That’s all.